Thoughts on #Hilmysha Junior and the usual "I miss you whenever you're away from me, miles apart"

 

*Sure as hell gonna get a scream from him, asking me to put down this photo but look.. I don't care honeybun. I miss you way too much today.

Tell me something new? Whenever he's away for a 2-nighter, I'll always be at this state. We literally spent our days together, physically when he's back. So tell me how do I spend my time apart from him? He's all that I've got. And baby, you know that.

I really love how it feels to have someone who reciprocates what I feel; Which simply means he does too. Even better, on days that I have not told him "I miss you"  yet, he'll be the first.
Is this how my life going to be like from now on? I bet it'll be so difficult even after marriage. I get to see his face, day/night. Well.. not that I haven't. We kind of almost "lived" together, near or far.

It feels great to have boring days with your plus one; Home is really where he is. I'm glad that you knocked on my doors, sayang. Blessed.

So the other day or way back, we've lightly discussed about kids. Yes, kind of early but I want him to know what I feel and that I don't want him to marry me, to have kids right away. As much as I love to bear his kids, deep down I know that I am not ready just yet, we're talking about 2-3 years of marriage life then I might consider. I wouldn't want myself to be a burden to my future beau, financially. I still feel that we have yet to discover a lot more about ourselves as man and wife.
I'd want to see the world with you, suffer hardships with you, giving love to you eternally. Cook and clean(or maybe the cleaning was more for you. hehe) for you, greet you with overwhelming emotions every time you come back home. Not only taking good care of you but your family too. A good Aunty to Mysha, probably a listening ear to Papa whenever has a hard day at work, a good rapport with Abang Fahmy, Kak Mar and also Fik. Once I'm married to you baby, I'm married into your family too. As much the nervousness now is already enough to kill me right now even though we're still 14 months ahead of the wedding, I'm sure I'll be a great partner for you and vice versa.

Excited seeing newly married couples already popped the cherry (okay dafug)  and carrying baby bumps(practically like 20% of the people I know and that does not include affiliations), it isn't my time yet; technically not in my right-state of mind. Like what I've told him before "If I could not take care of my sleep what more taking care of another life's." (Yes, I have a terrible sleeping pattern. One moment I can doze off like a baby while H's awake the next I can be so wide awake whenever I'm away from him, like now!)

I wasn't sure whether I could detect his slight disappointment but thankfully, the fiancé had the same thought as me. He, himself would like to be financially stable because come what may when I've already have Hilmysha junior swimming inside of me, I'll be likka tai-tai at home, of which I've already warned him. So till the day comes, I need to work my ass off and get my online business starting, not forgetting my future goals (not sure of it being realistic or ambitious, especially living in Singapore) which I might reveal in like 10 years later. heh.


So that was it. I heaved a sigh of relief. So until then when people start asking me " Abeh kalau ter-bomb macam mana?" (T: If one day, you find out you're pregnant?) Now that, well of course, we need a Plan B but I'm sure H's pretty much skilful in holding on his "jag-ger" or can he?*winks*

Gosh, I miss you bad now.
hehe.

xoxo.

The following entry has been Rated 21. Oh wait, who am I kidding? You guys have already read this. Till the next post!